The Proposal

Home base for his family is Bakersfield, they’re almond growers.

He somehow wrote out in very large letters on their acreage, MARRY ME, then took her up in their plane and let her see it from above. 

Sigh, just like in the movies. 

The Ceremony

The wedding was at 2 pm. 

We were told that immediately following the ceremony, there would be  busses waiting to load the guests and take us 45 minutes up a mountain to the grooms family ranch where the reception was being held. 

It had been raining all night, that meant SNOW up that mountain….. in a bus!!!

We were cautioned not to try to drive and assured that busses would be running back and forth all day, all evening.

Plus, there were locked gates we wouldn’t be able to get through.

This concerned us.  

We were planning on driving.

Our two furry four legged traveling companions, Lincoln and LooLoo were with us.

They were well behaved and would wait quietly for us in the hotel room but we never left them for too many hours ‘cause when a dog’s gotta pee, a dog’s gotta pee!

But, our choice was hop on the bus, Gus or stay behind. 

How do I describe a setting and ceremony that fits NO description? 

The church…..all glass and timber-beamed, sitting in the middle of a valley surrounded by thick woods of tall trees.

The windows went from floor to ceiling, the top half marshmallow colors of stained glass and the bottom clear, enabling the outside view of  grazing horses, surrounded by majestic mountains and the most amazing groves of Aspen trees busy showing off their Fall colors of red and yellow leaves. 

There were 7 bridesmaids all dressed in short wine colored lace dresses with heels that looked spiked as high as the 12-inch ruler I had in grade school.

They were stunningly beautiful young women.

Every one of them looked as if they were models on a catwalk but with smiling, happy faces. 

Then…here comes the bride!!! 

A teeny, tiny, adorable, beautiful bride with a lit-up happy face holding on the arm of her beaming, proud, (handsome) dad.  

They walked slowly down the aisle.

Her dress was as breathtakingly beautiful as I expected.

It was all lace, delicate and feminine and it softly outlined her teeny, tiny, young self.   

She wore a veil that covered her shoulders and flowed down to the bottom of her dress where a stunning train took over and trailed behind her glittering and sparkling . 

She and her dad spoke a few words as they worked their way to the front of the church.  

She acknowledged people with a smile as she passed by and then….. she looked up toward the front of the church and she saw him waiting up there for her…her handsome groom. 

His eyes were fixated on her and a few tears were traveling slowly down his crazy in-love face. 

When she reached him, she smiled and gently wiped his tears away. 

The ceremony was touching because it was personal. 

We were told the family’s parish priest was flown in from Bakersfield to marry them. 

He’d known the groom forever so when he spoke to them about love, he was really speaking to them, not just reading some words that sounded good. 

Immediately following the ceremony they were gone, no congratulation line in the back of the church and we were quickly loaded on to passenger busses and vans. 

There were over 200 people at the ceremony and every one of us were taken on a 45 minute journey up a mountain, to the very top where what we saw and participated in overwhelmed most all of us!!! 

The Reception….. 

The 45 minute ride, continually climbing upward took us through corkscrew twists and hairpin turns and then magically became groves of many different kinds of trees, each showing off their beautiful painted leaves shimmering in the sunshine.  

And grassy pastures with an abundance of wild life that made me wonder…..were they placed there just for this occasion?

Horses, deer, sheep, rabbits, huge birds, none of them looking up at  the humans passing through.  

It had been raining on and off for the past 2 days but that didn’t seem to dampen anyone’s spirits, everyone seemed to be enjoying the ride and in awe of what we were experiencing.

It was a bus full of happy, excited people all wondering, what’s next?  

We stopped at two security gates.

Our driver nodded to the attendants and were waved on.

When we approached the property, the busses and vans came to a hault one behind the other. 

Tuxedoed waiters greeted us as we stepped off the busses and out of the vans. 

They presented every one of us with a white, satin umbrella.

And there were more waite-staff everywhere, standing ready with  trays of hors d’oeuvres and drinks.

The squash on a stick and BLT stuffed tomatoes, were a picture I had to snap with my camera, something “classy” people don’t do I’m sure but, that left me out and I snapped.

We were pulled up to what I heard called a barn but that wasn’t what I think, when I think barn! 

It was more like a beautiful, new, lodge, a house even. 

I know nothing of LODGES other than maybe they’re glorified barns, but NOT this lodge! 

The outside was timber and rock and it was beautiful.

A huge patio spanned across the entire front.   

On that patio was a bar set up with 4 large, beautiful, crystal decanters, each with a different, exotic sounding, pastel colored lemonade…with or without Vodka. 

The Vodkas and Whiskeys, by the way,  came from a local boutique distillery in Park City. 

There were tall glass-encased heaters scattered around with shooting gas flames adding to the already amazing look AND FEEL. 

Huge patio umbrellas created a cover from the now and then drizzling rain.

We were on the very top of a mountain range, our view was level with the tallest of mountains surrounding us and forests of Aspen Trees  encompassed what was obviously their compound. 

Have you ever seen an Aspen Trees in the Fall? 

They’re magnificent.  

Across from a beautiful man-made lake where we were standing, was what could have been a 5 star hotel in the Swiss Alps but something told us that was the house. 

A timber, arched bridge spanned the lake leading from the house to a chalet that looked like a tiny replica of the obvious main residence.

Later we found that tiny house was the aritst cottage where the bride’s new mother-in-law painted, wish we would have window-peeked!

Servers were everywhere and continued to appear from some magical place with tasting-sized glasses of locally brewed Stout beer, and one hors d’oeuvre tray after another. 

I don’t like beer so I can only assume it was tasty by the way it was constantly disappearing off the waiters trays. 

I tried everything edible IF I could identify it. 

I’d already been told that the parents of the groom, who owned the complex were great hunters.

I wasn’t prepared to eat Bambi on a cracker or the raw, marinated Elk that everyone was going nuts over. 

It was on and off drizzling rain and it was DAMN COLD!

I was practically one with the heater nearest me. 

One of the MANY bartenders must have seen me shivering.

He brought me his jacket! 

I saw my husband slip him a twenty and that jacket was mine for the rest of the night! 

There were, of course minks here and there but I was real happy with the black quilted jacket with the Kirkland label. 

Now with a jacket warming me, I decided to wander on my own a bit. 

My sweet man was engrossed in conversation with a few of the people we’d met on the bus.

The huge barn doors were slid all the way open exposing an interior that would rival any living room on the cover of a glamorous magazine and remember… this was their BARN!!! 

I guess lodge is the better word. 

In the middle of the room was a mammoth, again beautiful beyond description, rock almost boulder, fireplace with an opening big enough to fit me and a couple other frozen women who unfortunately didn’t have a bartenders jacket on.

In front of and to the sides of the fireplace were beautiful, fluffy, comfy, cozy looking white sofas, love seats and chairs. 

Glass and timber side tables held lamps that MUST have come from the kind of stores I don’t shop at.  

The coffee table held figurines and sculptures like I’ve seen in downtown Carmel Art Galleries. 

There were 4 round, tall tables standing in the room with white linen table cloths draped to the floor holding more little edibles; crackers and cheeses that for sure were not KRAFT or even Tillamook.

The cheese drawer in my fridge has never held a cheese like any of those tasted.  

NOT your run-of-the-mill deli stuff! 

My curiosity got the best of me and I plopped one small piece of wild game salami on a delicious looking cracker and on to my lovely crystal plate. 

Someone told me it was wild boar…..I won’t lie I eat pork.

But, I try not to think about it when I do. 

For some reason, knowing the family who owned this compound were great hunters, I couldn’t help but visualize a large pig enjoying life, running free and all of a sudden being shot down and now on my cracker!

With each crunch, I heard an oink!

I passed by a huge bar near a corner of the room and walked through a mammoth river-rock opening and into an entire new world. 

 

In front of me was a huge rock and timber stairway leading up to what looked like a beyond-big open loft. 

One look at the decor on the walls winding up the stairs of beautiful animal heads stuffed with eyes glaring right through me and I decided I wasn’t going up! 

For the few moments I stood there, I think all 250 guests were either goin’ up or down. 

The ones going up had facial expressions of  amazement, maybe a little disbelief at what they were seeing.   

Some had a different looks on their faces coming down…..not all, but some.

I read the coming down faces and for sure didn’t want to go up there.  

I turned and made an exit back to the outside with the cold, the drizzling rain and the heaters. 

After maybe 15 minutes, even the warm jacket wasn’t doing the job. One of the waiters saw my uncontrollable shivers and suggested I go upstairs. 

He said there was a roaring fire and it was WARM up there. 

Okay, that was the magic word… WARM. 

So, up the stairs I went becoming more apprehensive and sad with every step. 

First to my hunter, reader friends….listen, I’ve owned leather furniture, jackets, purses and shoes. 

I’ve eaten hamburgers, pork roasts, bacon…..lots of bacon, KFC, (zillions of White Castles) and much, much more. 

I understand about the cowboys and Indians hunting for their food. 

I even get it about the hunters of today who fill their freezers. 

That’s NOT what this is about. 

This appeared to be trophy hunting…..simply the thrill of the kill.

There’s hunting for food to eat and there’s killing for fun AND, this is still a free country so my opiniin is just that!

So please, to you who capture and kill I respect your choices, I do. 

I think and feel different but that’s not what this is about, this is about a wedding experience. 

I got to the top of the stairs and it was all too much to take in at once.  THE DEAD ROOM, that’s the thought that came to mind.   

I told you the father of the groom, the owner of the compound, was a hunter but um… not like go in the woods during hunting season and kill Bambi kind of hunter…. no, this was Ramar-Of-The-Jungle…. of-the-world, kind of hunter. 

I wanted out of this HUGE upstairs but, it WAS warm up there so I went over and sat on the hearth of another huge rock fireplace. 

At least half of the 250 guests were walking around trying to take it all in.  

I heard every kind of comment relating to the amazement of what they were seeing. 

I saw smiles and heard “wows” from some and “ewww” and “yuk” from others. 

I was soon joined by one of the very few people I knew at this gala event, she was cold too. 

We watched and listened to everyone as they walked by. 

I could tell by her comments that she was feeling pretty much like me. 

The walls were covered with the heads of every imaginable kind of animal.

I’m gonna assume we’ve all been in restaurants and bars, cottages even homes with huge fish, deer and other wild animals mounted on their walls.

But I can almost guarantee you’ve never seen anything like this. 

Even my world-wide-traveler-friend Joe Dellapenna, I’ll bet you’ve never seen anything like this….not even in a museum. 

It was like walking through a zoo or even a jungle without barriers because from every tiny creature to the hugest of magnificent beasts…..none of them could move.

Birds, mice, squirrels, skunks, raccoons, goats, sheep…..you name it, they were there.

Deer, elk, moose, lions, tigers, bears, zebras and so many others.

So much of the animal kingdom represented in that room.

And, if that wasn’t enough, their environment was recreated and   that part was beyond beautiful. 

The “water” was made from some sort of glass that looked just like real water and there were little waterfalls and streams of real water flowing, NOT like the stuff we put in our backyards, no this was like a real waterfall and streams right out of the wild! 

If you didn’t know it wasn’t real, you’d think it was!

   

Every piece of furniture up in that loft, every single piece, was made from animals that had been captured and killed including the sofa which was all alligator skin. 

We heard someone say that the great hunter himself had caught and drowned the alligator that was now a sofa. 

I have zero fondness for alligators, I can’t even stand lizards but well….how do you drown an alligator?? 

Elk horns were incorporated into one of the chairs. 

Even the huge boulder rock bar had panels of Zebra skin on it. 

I still don’t know how you drown an alligator! 

The very first hunted animal was a deer in 1963, killed by the man who started it all, the patriarch, who was now in his 90’s and planted the first almond tree which eventually made the entire family of 3 generations obviously very comfortable. 

As my friend and I sat there, we smiled and with lips barely moving so no one could read them, and in very low tones so no one could hear us we shared how sad we thought it was and swore we’d never eat another ALMOND again! 

Well never except Mocha Almond Fudge ice cream! 

Oh, for you hunters, here’s one for you…..this man has a certificate awarding him “The Grand Slam Of Bighorn Sheep” and there has only been 1500 awarded in the world, the WORLD! 

So, I got my little camera out and began snapping and counting. 

I got up to one hundred something but lost count when I ran into a most beautiful Zebra. 

It ripped at me, I put my camera away and went down the stairs, outside and stood in the rain. 

I was only in sad, deep thought for moments because the next event was pretty incredible.

Standing out on that mountain top in Utah, hugging the flaming gas heater, reminded me of something I liked forgetting….. being COLD! 

I visualized removing my boots to find ten blue toesicles. 

The drizzling rain decided to take a break and I saw my sweet man  coming toward me. 

He motioned for me to look up at a very strange thing moving around high above our heads. 

It looked like maybe a small table had escaped from inside, four little legs kinda dangling from a squared top. 

My brain was already on overload so at this point I figured this could be anything, maybe the President of the United States was gonna jump outta that thing… maybe Elvis? 

Who knew? 

Reality ruined my fantasy when I was told it was a Drone! 

But of course…..a Drone zipping around up there snapping pictures. 

I noticed guests looking toward the hotel-sized house. 

Then I saw the newlyweds on the bridge that went over the small lake connecting to the house. 

Did I mention that the wedding photographer was not a photographer but an entire TEAM of photographers? 

Oh yes! 

The couple crossed the bridge slowly with photographers snapping every step of the way. 

When they reached the Lodge, a loud announcing voice from somewhere asked everyone to step outside. 

At this point I had some of it figured out. 

I knew there was going to be a dinner and dancing and there was no spot to feed 250 people in the Lodge.

Was it going to happen in the main house?

 

My visions of grandeur were interrupted by the sound of a motor…..in the sky!! 

I saw it come out of the clouds….. a small plane. 

It came down real low and passed over us a few times so I knew this was not just a plane going somewhere. 

Nope, this plane wanted to be right where it was. 

There was one nice blue opening in the sky, put there I’m sure just for that plane! 

We all watched as it drew a huge heart in the sky.

 A wedding card wouldn’t do, oh no… It had to be written in the sky!!! 

After the heart, for the next 20 minutes, that plane did acrobats in the sky, rolling, twirling and sometimes making me think it was coming straight down to crash at my feet. 

Just as my nurse-brain was reviewing CPR, the plane took a final bow and disappeared into the clouds. 

Next the bride and groom requested we all follow them and 250 people walked toward the bridge.

The tents…..

It was like a PIed Piper scene; 250 happy, curious people following the bride and groom across a bridge and on to a path of huge pieces of flagstone in the middle of a beautiful Aspen forest.

It wasn’t real, the white stuff falling on the ground. 

It was for effect, I was sure of it…..except it was kinda wet and real cold.

I told myself not to even look down so I didn’t but damn I thought, that’s about as real as pretend gets!  

As soon as we crossed over the bridge, I knew we weren’t headed for the house, we were passing it by.  

Crap!

I’m not sure my wild imagination could even begin to visualize the inside of that amazingly humungous, butt-kickin’ house, so I would have liked to have seen it for real.

Oh well.

I was COLD, my feet were frozen, my teeth were chattering. 

Just Puhleeze…take me somewhere warm. 

A very short time after passing the house I saw it. 

A huge white tent with two smaller ones attached to the back of it.

 

 

When we entered, we were taken to table number one! 

Really?

Wow, table number one….. which in reality meant nothing other than it’s number was one.

So far, it was all breathtaking; the wedding, the bride, the food & drinks and the bride’s mom (my friend) looked elegant but I was COLD! 

We were going into a tent, in the middle of the woods, high up on a mountain top with snow on the ground.

This might be the deal breaker for me…..I needed to somehow get warm.  

I’d never been inside a tent except the kind my mom made with blankets over the clothesline when I was a little girl, and the kind I made with blankets over the back of the sofa for my little girls.

 

This tent had a floor…. as far as I could tell it was a wood floor…..a real wood floor.

How the heck do they do that? 

A real floor in a tent! 

The next morning I heard that so much dancin’ to the beat, beat, beat caused the floor to feel like it was beginning to bounce like maybe it wasn’t gonna continue to be a floor! 

But, it made it.  

We settled at table number one with the only two people we knew other than the bride’s parents.  

4 other friendly people joined us at number one.

We all introduced ourselves and exchanged a bit of why we were at this affair.

The first Cosmo the nearby bartender made for me was not so good.

I think he knew it so he came over to our table with an apology Cosmo. 

Cosmo number two? 

Not so bad.

At that point, the best part was it was very warm inside that big white tent and I began to thaw!

The bride’s dad, began the evening with an introduction, a thank you to their guests, a few funny, clever lines and then loving words to his daughter and her husband. 

He did a great job.

Next was an absolutely hysterical skit from the bride’s two best girlfriends who did a routine smack out of The Bridesmaids movie and if you haven’t seen it, rent it. 

They brought tears of laughter.

And finally the grooms two older brothers took the stage. 

They acted out a scene from their high school days involving one very important baseball game. 

From watching and listening, I could tell those 3 brothers have some butt-kickin’ memories of times together. 

The Moms……….. 

The bride’s mom, well she was dazzling! 

She’s tiny like her daughter and wore a sequined, royal blue, absolutely beautiful, 2-piece jacket and  short “pencil” skirt with high, high heels. Her hair was pulled behind one ear with simple curled ends yet very chic. 

She was beautiful, a perfect look for a bride’s mom. 

(Nice job, girlfriend!).

The groom’s mom looked elegant. 

She wore a floor length, not tight but kinda figure hugging dress, it accentuated her waistline, (can you imagine a waistline in today’s world? Well, she had one!) 

It was a kinda muted bronze-metallic color, very plain from waist down and a little fussier on top. 

Her long, platinum hair was in a very loose, feminine up-do with whisps of hair circling her lovely face. 

She looked elegant. 

The Music…..

There was music playing when we entered the big white tent. 

A “DJ” doesn’t seem quite the appropriate description for such an event, but I don’t know what else to call this guy. 

He and his equipment were right next to our table at the base of a  large stage. 

He played music for maybe the first hour while the bride, groom and their two sets of parents visited table to table thanking all their guest for sharing in this happening. 

Thanking US?? 

Over all the days of my life, I’ve experienced my share of awesomeness but the wedding so far, well it was right up there with the best… almost sensory overload! 

The music was an interesting selection of each decade, beginning with the Big Band sound going right on thru to this 21st century of ours. 

There was the traditional first dance of the bride and groom. 

They never took their eyes off one another, and oh that lost-in-love look, it was just the two of them, floating to the music and probably a good thing that no one could read what their lips and looks were saying to each other. 

Kinda like watching a great, romantic movie or even remembering your own once-upon-a-time. 

The bride and her dad danced along with the groom and his mom. 

Watching them dancing, smiling, talking threw me into a melancholy place and I thought how fast it all goes….you’re the kid, then the bride, next the mom and then bang….you’re dancin’ at your kids wedding! 

The food…..

I was curious about the food, there had been no selective choices. 

How had they figured to satisfy 250 different appetites? 

I didn’t wonder for long. 

From the back of the stage, behind an opening in a big white curtain which seemed to connect the two smaller tents to the big one came the army of waiters…..all at the same time, carrying huge trays and in a moment, we we all had salads placed in front of us. 

I had to just look at mine for a moment before I placed a fork into it and disturbed what looked like a little masterpiece of butter leaf lettuce, cranberries, feta cheese crumbles, 3 very thin apple slices and…of course, slivered ALMONDS.

I’ve had similar looking salads like this before but the moment the first forkful entered my mouth, nope….nothin’ quite like this. 

The dressing? 

I don’t know.

Orgasmatic to the taste buds is all I could think.

The waiters stood behind the tables, far enough not to be rude but close enough to jump if anyone needed something and when they were sure we were finished with our salads, the plates were quickly removed. 

Within minutes, the army of servers reappeared. 

A beautiful piece of Rainbow Trout on top of what looked like black beans with artfully placed long, green, french beans (ALMONDine, of course) was the next treat. 

They may have looked like black beans or maybe legume is a better word but for sure not any black bean I’d ever tasted! 

I couldn’t identify any of the spices that gave them a flavor that kinda made me want to pick up my plate and lick it clean like my dog Lincoln does! 

The Trout? 

Well, I guess you’d have to taste it to believe it. 

Even the green beans, which I love were better than any I’d ever had. 

They did it, delighted everyones taste buds without ever asking what we all preferred. 

To the surprise of most everyone, with trays above their head the waiters reappeared with…..more food! 

Filet Mignon surrounded by the most creamy, delicious Risotto I could ever hope to taste. 

I wasn’t hungry anymore but that had nothing to do with it and, well… I can’t believe I ate the whole thing!!!! 

Probably most everyone has had filet before, right? 

And, how can it be anything but delicious? 

Well, it can and it was in that big white tent!!! 

Melt in your mouth? 

Cut with a fork? 

Seasoned and cooked to perfection? 

WAY beyond that. 

WAY!!!

So good I truly believe it could knock a vegetarian’s socks off!  

Of course there was dessert. 

A beautiful pear cut in half drizzled in a sauce and chopped ALMONDS and ohhhh soooo good.

It was all an experience within an experience.

The feast ended, the coffee was served. 

I don’t even like coffee but figured a cup of this coffee would be a treat…..and it was! 

The tables were quickly cleared , most of the waiters disappeared, the wine was flowing and happy people were celebrating. 

The Band…..

Our backs were to the stage so we didn’t actually see them come in but all of a sudden there was a loud pulsating-beat and the live music began. 

There were 8 of them. 

The lead singer was an adorable, petite gal, I don’t know, 25? 30? 

I can’t tell anymore. 

She had beautiful, long brown hair and as she belted out the songs, her thick mane flew from one side of her face to the other. 

Her wedged-heeled shoes made her about a foot taller than she really was.

She must have had to take some kind of class to learn how to even stand up in them. 

What I wanted to tell you about the band beside the fact that their sound was phenomenal is that it was the band that played in Jimmy Kimmel and LeBron James’s weddings. 

They were THAT good. ………… 

Oh and as an after-thought, we heard this band had really been their SECOND choice……so FIRST choice was who….Beyonce??? 

I’d heard the term “dance band” before but guess I didn’t realize it meant dance and dance and dance. 

There was no break from song to song…the last note of one song ended and the first of the next began, all to the same fast…..I mean fast rhythmic beat. 

I couldn’t figure out how the band kept going, let alone at least 200 of the 250 guests!! 

How do you do that….fast dance for over an hour?? 

We jumped in and out a couple times but most everyone just kept goin’ and they were havin’ such a fun time.

I might add in our defense, they were mostly younger by quite a bit. 

At one point one of the (adorable) male singers took his microphone, jumped off the stage, into the crowd and they all went wild! 

They were a great, great band. 

They played non-stop for over an hour. 

I was hoping for one slow song but it didn’t happen. 

And then it was past 9 o’clock.

No biggie unless you have near an hour ride to get back to your hotel room and 2 dogs waiting to go out and pee. 

And so we said our farewells to our table mates, followed the flagstone path back up to a line of waiting transport vans and requested we be taken down the mountain. 

That forest of beautiful Aspen trees was lit with spotlights on them and teeny lights strung around their trunks, an enchanting sight, even made me forget how FRIGGIN’ cold I was….for a moment!  

One last touch….we were each given a bag of warm, freshly popped Kettle Korn to munch on as we drove that looooong, very, very dark ride back to town.

We missed the cutting and eating of the cake. 

I don’t even remember seeing a cake so I’m gonna guess it was rolled in on a lovely table, a muti-layered, spectacular looking and flavors-never-before-tasted, wedding cake. 

We also missed the bouquet and garter toss. 

The next morning at brunch, I asked a friend to fill me in on the cake, bouquet and garter. 

And this man, a man I’ve known for what seems like forever, a man I hold in such high esteem, a pillar in his community, a legend in his own time….this man told me he remembered nothing as he had “beverage overload.” 

You might wonder where everyone went to pee? 

Well we WERE in a forest of Aspen trees but they were all lit and besides, REALLY? 

I never mastered peein’ in the forest and it was too cold anyways!! 

But, a bit in front of and to the side of the big tent was another temporary structure. 

It’s hard to describe outside porta-john toilets in the freezing cold Utah woods as well, lovely…but, they were. 

They were big, warm bathrooms decorated nicer than bathrooms I’ve seen in houses…including mine! 

Fresh cut flowers and oh, you wish you had some hair spray or, lotions, mouthwash, floss, soft perfume sprays, a new dress maybe?? 

There was so much “equipment” that I half expected a hair stylist, a make-up artist, maybe even a massage therapist to appear in a poof and offer their services. 

I’m sure I’ve forgotten things I wanted to remember but I’ll remember the things I didn’t forget…..forever!